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The Foul Miasma of Our Very Lives!

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Someone once said, "It's a man's world!" 


"Real men don't get all twisted in the head and absorbed with their feelings like you women!" So said an, obviously male, genius on Facebook one day.

"Allow me to retort," said I. "Of course, we men don't get all twisted in the head and absorbed with our feelings like women! And for this," I added, sarcastically, "We're thanking our very lucky stars! We have life so much better..."

Because we drink, we slink, we shrink, we stink,
chug, mug, drug, shrug, play the thug, act so smug,
gamble, gambol, amble, ramble, shamble, scamble,
fumble, mumble, bumble, rumble, stumble, scramble...

We wage, drage, engage, enrage, assuage, set the stage to rant and rage,
founder, flounder, say we found her, astound her, try to be profounder,
chunder, sunder, blunder, bottle thunder, steal some plunder, rip lives asunder,
pander, gander, mander, slander, can't stand her, in all candor talk of slander...

We dible, libel, label, enable, disable,
erupt, corrupt, disrupt, interrupt,
ape, jape, lape, scrape, rape, escape,
back off, hack off, whack off, jack off...

We, fuck off, muck off, shuck off, pluck off, smuck off,
buck up, muck up, suck up, fuck up, wreck a truck, press our luck,
muck around, shuck around, fuck around, catch her on the rebound,
blaze a blunt, smoke a bone, smoke a bowl, on the dole, fire in the hole...

We burn a doob, grab a boob, fuck a noob, play the rube
state a gripe, steal and swipe, shit and shipe, hit the pipe,
get high, flit and fly, don't ask why, kiss the sky, moan and sigh,
tie off, fill the trough, whoop and cough, want to boff, act the toff...

We slap an arm, lure and charm, plow the farm, sound the alarm,
shoot a wad, fishing rod, hook a cod, ain't that odd,
fuzz the brain, muscle strain, live in pain, pump a vein,
shoot up, shut up, ramp up, put up, back up, what's up...

We blow off, steam off, doze off, nod off, stand off,
stand up, stand in, stand out, tune in, tune out,
zone in, zone out, drop in, drop out,
beat feet, suck a teat, rip and cheat, drink it neat, over eat our barbecue meat...

We go to slaughter, consult a lawter, be not bowater, drink bong water,
multitasking, backward masking, cot for basking, tell not asking,
pushing back the dark and dreary, bleak and bleary, sad and weary, gloomy, teary, binding, blinding, grinding, ever winding, never minding, lost not finding...

Oppressive, infernal, eternal, sex journal, seed kernel, never vernal, act fraternal,
Lives aswirling, ever twirling, beat a sperling, hump a gerling, fingers curling,
suffer bronchial asthma, sell blood plasma, see ectoplasma, eat a banana,
While trying not to breath the foul miasma,
of our very lives...

Why would we want to feel anything when we've got all this going for us?

 Shaking My Damn Head, and Rolling On the Floor, Laughing My Ass Off!

All of the words in the preceeding rant have been painstakingly examined for their proper spelling, and are, in fact, properly spelled real English words. Google any that you don't recogmize. Whoever said that the Internet can't be educational!?


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